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Posts filed under: Relationships

According to the data available on the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence’s (NCADV) website, one in 15 children in the U.S. witnessed IPV in 2010. One in three children who were exposed to IPV were themselves victims of abuse....
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Recent and some not-so-recent events have highlighted the many ways we have found to divide us. How do we navigate different beliefs, values and opinions with compassion and respect for our significant others, parents, siblings or close friends?...
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COVID-19 and the associated stay-at-home orders have brought attention to the issue of intimate partner violence (IPV) as well as other forms of domestic violence such as child abuse. Increased isolation, as well as new stresses, have increased the incidents...
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Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a modality developed in the late 1970s by Dr. Marsha M. Linehan, a psychology researcher at the University of Washington. DBT became the gold star treatment for borderline personality disorder, which had always been resistant...
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Have you ever wondered why it is so difficult to choose just one emoji to express your reaction to a friend’s Facebook post? If yes, then you might find it interesting to learn about the multiplicity principle frequently mentioned in...
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Practicing gratitude is not a new concept, but it seems to be getting a lot of buzz lately. Messages abound about how counting one’s blessings rather than focusing on what is lacking can resolve a multitude of issues including both...
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Issues with attachment are often associated with children, particularly children who have lost a significant caretaker or children in adoption situations who didn’t receive proper loving care as babies and, as a result, exhibit negative behaviors or emotional difficulties throughout...
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How to Stay When You Want to Flee Relationships are hard. Maintaining a happy coexistence with another human being – even someone you care deeply about – has its challenges. Like any living thing, relationships change over time and are...
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The need to be right is a common human trait. We all want to look our best in front of others, but when does that need cross over to being more destructive than constructive? And is it useful in the...
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Our therapists often hear from clients that, in relationships of many kinds (with bosses, coworkers, significant others, partners, friends, family) they lack the confidence to ask for what they need. In an effort to avoid being seen as pushy, demanding...
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Keep the Fireworks in Your Marriage – And Be a Good Parent New parents, as well as those who have been at it for a while, can find themselves  drifting apart as they put more and more effort into caring...
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Kirk always knew that he wanted to be a father.  As a single gay man in his late 20s, however, he wasn’t sure how fatherhood would become a reality. “I started putting feelers out about how to do it.  I...
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September 11, 2001, changed the way we view the world. A rise in enlistment numbers following 9/11 reflect that many men and women felt compelled to answer the call to serve their country. For military couples or families, the aftermath...
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Teen Dating Few words spark more concern for a parent. The realities of dating make teenagers uncomfortable as well. Parents worry about an increase in risky behavior and the drama that can come with dating. Teens face all the social...
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Do you believe that depression, anxiety, fear, and emptiness are the new ‘normal’? Have you given up on the idea that you can change your life because “nothing works”? Then please read on… there is an explanation for why you...
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Marta Oko-Riebau, MA A successful relationship requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. – Mignon McLaughlin Remember that time when you were madly in love with your partner? It was enough to be in the same room...
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By Marta Oko-Riebau Linda and Jerry were a great couple. They truly enjoyed each other’s company, had great conversations, and laughed a lot together, even six years after they got married. There was one thing however that was not great:...
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By Marta Oko-Riebau Ava always wanted to have a house with a garden and a Siamese cat that she would call “Sphinx”. Growing up at her parent’s apartment she was not allowed to have pets because her parents considered them...
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by Marta Oko-Riebau, MA Grow old along with me… Two branches of one tree… Face the setting sun when the day is done… This is a beautiful vision of a relationship that lasts until the end, presented by John Lennon in his...
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by Aleisha Maunu, MA, LMFT, LAC Think about a time when you were with someone you care about and you became angry. We all have experienced it: where time seems to stand still, we are not thinking clearly, or seemingly not...
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by Chris Lewis Ed.S., LPC As a therapist, I don’t often see toxic people in my office. They don’t like the scrutiny of looking at themselves and their behavior toward others. The people I see in my office are often...
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by Chris Lewis, Ed.S., LPC A reader recently asked if it is possible to stop being codependent in a relationship, and how one would go about that. Yes, it is possible. Not necessarily easy, but possible. First of all, how...
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by Aleisha Maunu, MA, LMFT, CACII When I was in college, I was friends with a fellow music major who was dating another music major. They seemed so very much in love – they spent tons of time together, had...
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by Chris Lewis Ed.S., LPC Years ago I had this friend. We both lived in a relatively small town on the east coast, were the same age, and had mutual friends. It was convenient for us to hang out together...
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by Chris Lewis Ed.S., LPC As a couple and family therapist, I have lost count of the times I have heard three little words spoken in my office that have a hugely negative effect on relationships. It’s something we have...
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by Chris Lewis, Ed.S., LPC The phrase “control freak” can mean a lot of things in relationships. It might mean that a partner has a particular way that they prefer the laundry folded or a certain way of handling finances....
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by Chris Lewis, Ed.S., LPC The short answer is “No.” Only you two can save your marriage, but counseling can help if there is commitment to change on both sides. Few experiences in life are as painful as finding out...
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by Chris Lewis, Ed.S., LPC It has been asked before; In fact, I might have been one of the ones wanting to know. There are a few things that typically come as a great shock to people when they take...
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by Chris Lewis, Ed.S., LPC On second thought, it might be easier to first look at a few signs that you aren’t ready for relationship commitment: When your date comes over for an evening together, you have already set up...
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by Chris Lewis Ed.S., LPC Couples come to marriage counseling for a variety of reasons; infidelity, lack of intimacy, frequent arguing, having “grown apart,” and more. The one thing that these couples often share, despite what brought them to this...
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